Ignore me now
by MrsPadfootProngs
Summary: SiriusRemus - Isn't it strange how a little event can lead to a huge confession? Well Sirius finds this out first hand when he gets ignored by Remus. Go on, review you know you want to!


Ignore me now

By

Mrs PadfootProngs

DISCLAIMER – **Yes they actually do…. What do you mean to don't believe me, fine be like that, believe what you want. I don't care**

AUTHOR NOTE – **Hello, yes surprisingly I'm not dead, I know some of you may have thought that and I couldn't exactly blame you but I have finally return to you with my latest offering. Not sure how it came about, why it came about or anything like that. I just hope you enjoy my offering of fluff to you all.**

There were several things in the life of Sirius Black that he found himself disliking. He disliked his family, he disliked having to get up in the morning, and he disliked having to share a classroom with any Slytherin especially a certain greasy one who shall remain nameless but what he disliked more than anything else was being ignored by Remus Lupin.

He was well aware that the other boy didn't mean it, normally Remus just got too involved in whatever he was doing to notice what he was going; whether it be homework, or reading, or playing a game of chess with either Lily Evans or James Potter, but that fact remained to Sirius that Remus's attention was on something else, when it should have clearly been on him.

Perhaps that's why he found himself battling his emotions as he laid on his front on his bed, glaring at Remus who was reading, completely unaware of his room mates feelings or even his mood. Sirius supposed he was quite lucky that James and Peter Pettigrew had decided that they were both starving, regardless of the three portions of dinner that were already in their stomach, and had disappeared to the kitchens, hopefully for quite a while.

It was good because it gave Sirius the chance to stare at Remus to his hearts content since the only one who could have seen him look that way, was lost in some other world where Sirius couldn't join him. He couldn't exactly remember when he had started watching Remus, or when his feelings of friendship had suddenly not seemed enough and had descended into love instead. All he knew was that when he was with Remus, even in the same room as the other boy, he found himself feeling strangely peaceful, all his chaotic thoughts seemed to quieten and his muscles which were always active and tense relaxed.

He tilted his head and watched Remus turn the page. Sirius always liked the way that Remus's hair always fell into his eyes no matter how often the other boy brushed the offended strands away. He had noticed as well, that the colour, which had been a gorgeous golden blond when they were 11, was beginning to darken to a blond-brown colour. He noticed as well the Remus's pale skin had began to tan in the warm May weather and that freckles were beginning to emerge across his nose and cheeks. He also noticed that the amber eyes he loved, were now staring at him with an intense, quizzical look, the same look he gave his lessons. Sirius had always hated that look, Remus gave him that look and Sirius wanted to spill all his darkest secrets out to him.

A heavy silence hung between them; obviously Remus was waiting for Sirius to explain why he was glaring at him so ominously, while Sirius was taking a second to admire his friend's eyes further. Finally when the silence began to feel oppressive, Sirius spoke, his voice a curious mixture of lightness and seriousness.

"You know, I really hate it when you do that?" He watched as Remus's face fell into a quick frown before the other boy spoke with the Irish accent that always caused a shiver to descend up and down his back every time he heard it.

"Every time I do what Padfoot?" he asked "You'll have to be slightly more specific" Sirius found himself admiring Remus's voice yet again, it always sounded smooth, well almost always, for a week after his transformation the voice was harsh sounding, as if each uttered word was ripping the other boy's throat apart. Sirius had always hated the fact that Remus would feel that pain and that he couldn't help him anymore than he did.

"When you ignore me" Sirius replied, pushing himself off his front and getting into a more comfortable position. Remus raised his eyebrow so they were lost in his fringe.

"I wasn't ignoring you Padfoot," came the reply, Sirius watched as Remus settled himself into a more comfortable position before continuing to speak "I was just reading, anyway Sirius you're impossible to ignore, I should know I've tried on several occasions" The frown lifted off Sirius's face for a second as he grinned

"Why because of my dashing good looks?" he asked, Remus seemed to consider what he had said for a few moment before shaking his head

"No, I don't think it's because of that" he replied

"No" Sirius said, cocking his head to the side very much like a dog would do "Is it because of my charming manner then"

"Charming manner?" Remus said with a slight laugh "No that's not quite it either"

"Witty conversation?" he tried again, Remus nodded

"Kind of, the sentence I was looking for was, because you never shut up, but I suppose witty conversation could fall under that" Sirius made a face as he stood up and made his way over to Remus's bed.

"Budge up," he commanded, whacking one of Remus's legs to make his intent clear. Remus rolled his eyes but complied shuffling up slightly so Sirius could lie on his bed with him. It was something they often did and they thought no more of it then they did when it came to breathing, it was just something they did. A silence settled between them again and Sirius found himself drifting off to sleep a last feeling coming over him, when Remus suddenly spoke

"You were glaring at me in that way just because I was ignoring you?" Sirius opened his eyes slowly to see Remus frowning down at him.

"Yeah I told you, I hate it when you ignore me, hate isn't even the right word, I detest it when you do it" Remus placed his book down which Sirius took as a bad sign, when Remus placed his book down it was normally because something else had occupied his mind.

"Why would it bother you so much that I was ignoring you?" the lazy feeling that had flooded Sirius left as quickly as it had come leaving him painfully aware of everything. He knew exactly what the answer to that question would lead to and he didn't think himself ready to discuss that with anyone, he didn't even like to hear his mind debate it.

"I don't like anyone ignoring me" he muttered not looking at Remus, he got to his feet as he spoke "I'm gonna check where the other two are, they've been far too long" He shot Remus a slight smile before making his way out of the dorm room, not giving Remus the chance to say anything in reply.

Outside he began strolling through the common room, trying to look as natural as he could so no one would see the inward panicking that was occurring, it obviously worked to some extent because everyone glanced at him as he entered and than turned back to what they were doing, well not all of them, some of the girls stared at him in a lusty fashion but he ignored them. Instead he slipped out of the common room and began walking aimlessly round, all his restless energy returning now that Remus wasn't about to calm him.

He felt almost dizzy with everything. His brain was screaming at him for being thick, telling him that he knew his feelings, knew why Remus ignoring him pissed him off so much and that it was about time he confessed his love to the other boy. His heart was pumping hard as if it wanted to screw at him as well. Sirius just didn't know what to do. He knew what he wanted, he just wasn't exactly sure if he was willing to risk his friendship with Remus because of it. Telling some random girl he liked them was easy. Telling his best friend he was in love with them was not, he couldn't even bear to think of not having Remus's friendship. He supposed that if he never told the other boy than the other boy would never know about how he felt. How there was a slim chance that perhaps he would feel the same way. He wondered vaguely where all his Gryffindor courage was now since it had seemed to have disserted him.

"There you are, I should have known that you would have been in the most awkward place to be," Sirius turned round blinking in shock as he realised he had somehow managed to wander outside the school, pass the grounds and towards the lake which stood directly in front of him.

"Moony," he said running a hand through his hair, trying very hard not to loom flustered in any way. He saw Remus roll his eyes and speak it a rapid fashion.

"It's so bloody typical of you, you know," he lectured sternly "here," he passed Sirius his jumper with a slight frown that told Sirius that his friend wasn't really angry at him, that he was more concerned than anything else. "You never think do you, coming out here with only a t-shirt on, I know its May but its not warm in the evenings, James and Peter came back about 5 minutes after you left and said they never saw you, you were also meant to start a piece of homework but obviously you forgot leaving me to come down here and get you." Sirius watched him speak and opened his mouth to defend himself.

"I love you" he closed his mouth with a clap and frowned, now that most certainly not been what he wanted to say, in fact he was pretty clear that had been the last thing he wanted to say. Remus seemed shocked too because his lecture trailed off and he stood there giving a remarkably good impression of a stranded fish.

"Excuse me?" he demanded, "What did you say?" Sirius looked helplessly at him and opened his mouth again to apologies, or at least let him know that it wasn't the truth, well it was but he didn't want Remus to know that yet

"I love you Remus" he closed his mouth again and looked frustrated, now this was beginning to get annoying he concluded.

"Love me" Remus stuttered, Sirius stood there watching him because he wasn't really sure what else he was meant to do.

"Yeah," he managed finally "I do, weird huh" he gave a nervous laugh and ran a hand over the top of head, in all the way he could have thought about doing this moment he somehow didn't think it would be like that. The best one he had imagined was doing it in the library but that was…. His thoughts trailed off as Remus took 5 steps towards him, grabbed him by the head and kissed him. Sirius automatically responded, his brain registering two things in his surprise. One that Remus John Lupin was a surprisingly good kisser and two that it felt damn good and damn right. When they separated, Remus rolled his eyes

"Come on, we better get back, you and James have work to do and don't think just because I love you back that I'm going to let you slack now," he grabbed Sirius by the arm and began dragging him back to the castle. Not that he met much resistance. Sirius just continued walking beside him with the largest grin on his face

"Well Moony, at least you won't be able to ignore me now" and Remus, glancing at the happy face to the side of him, couldn't have agreed more.

**A/N – Interesting I'm not exactly sure what I think of this piece, it's kinda of jumbled but it's meant to be because it's meant to show Sirius's confusion. Oh well I hoped you enjoyed it, please review but don't flame. Err that's all I guess**


End file.
